tiistai 11. elokuuta 2020

5 merkkiä, joista voi päätellä olevansa maalainen

1. Oravat eivät ole ihania
Nämä pähkinöitä mutustavat pikkusöpöläiset temmeltävät hetkessä välikaton palasiksi ja kuivaamon tulitikuiksi . Pörrökorvia kohtaan ainut järkevä tunne on murhanhimo.


2. Koira on no..koira
Joskus maalainen saa monttu auki seurata, kuinka hankalaa koiran omistaminen voi olla. Töistä on tulipalokiire pissattamaan koiraa, on koulutuspantaa ja aktivointilelua, on tassuvoidetta ja kiire trimmiin ja koirakerhoon. Koira on kauhea riesa, jonka takia sännätään häntä suorana huolesta harmaana. Huh hellettä. Ei maalla tarvi. Mustille voi antaa traktorissa puolet eväsleivästä.

Limppu,13 vuotta, voi vahvistaa, että ilman kummempia kommervenkkejä voi tulla toimeen


3. Auto on ajamista varten
Auto ei ole pesemistä, ei puunaamista, ei tuunaamista, eikä esittäytymistä varten. Autolla liikutaan paikoista toisiin, vaikka matkan varrella auto ei siitä varsinaisesti paranisi. Penkeille istutaan, vaikka haalarinpersuuksessa on kuraa.

4. Sälekaihtimet on hankalat
Kyllä umpimaalaiselle suurin kulttuurishokki taajama-asumisessa taitaa olla sälekaihtimet. Siis häh, ne pitää muistaa laittaa kiinni ja auki, aamua iltaa ja päivisinkin, jos erehdyt riisumaan päällystakin pois, ettei vaan kukaan näe sisälle, tai ettet vahingossa näkis ulos. Hirveää.

5. Kun ei vaan tarvi ostaa mitään
Siinä missä ns. Normaali ihminen ratkaisee erilaisia arkielämän ongelmia ostamalla jonkin tuotteen tai palvelun, maalla se ei käy päinsä.
Ratkaisu voidaan katsoa onnistuneeksi, kun mitään ei tarvinnut ostaa, siitäkin huolimatta, vaikka jollakulla meinasi lähteä henki.

 
Maalla asuminen on aiheena myös podcastimme Landella luistaa uusimmassa jaksossa. Mikä on parasta maalla asumisessa? Miten pelaa nykyään naapuriapu? Miten arki muuttui, kun Kiira muutti kaupungista pienelle Temmeksen kylälle?
 
 
 
Maalla asumista olen käsitellyt blogissa aiemminkin. Voit lukea postauksia linkeistä alta.




11 kommenttia:

  1. Inhorealistinen, mutta todenmukainen yhteenveto. Kaupunkilaiset ovat aivan oma rotunsa, kuin alienit Marsista. Maalla voi tuijotella maailman napaa rauhallisesti, kun taas kaupungeissa toisten navat ja tietysti oma napa ovat tärkeimmät. Maalla vai kaupungissa, molemmilla asumismuodoilla on omat hyvät ja huonot puolensa. Teksteissäsi on ihanan pippurista ja tarkasti osuvaa huumoria, siksi niitä tulee luettua. Ei turhaa lässytystä vaan suoraan asiaan, kunnolla tykittämällä...:)

    VastaaPoista
    Vastaukset
    1. Molemmissa on kyllä juurikin omat hyvät puolensa :) Ja kiitos ihanasta palautteesta, tuommoinen palaute auttaa hyväksymään oman kirjoitustyylinsä.

      Poista
  2. Koirat.... Minä en esimerkiksi ymmärrä koirien hampaiden harjausta. Olen kait sen verran tollo. Mulle koira harjaa hampaansa kun annan sille niskaluun. Miksi pitäis tehdä muuta? :D

    VastaaPoista
  3. Jos tarvitset ammattimaista apua varastetun bitcoinin tai kryptovaluutan palauttamiseksi ja puolison puhelimen etähakkeroinnin, ota yhteyttä extremeinfiltrators@gmail.com

    VastaaPoista
  4. Oravat on kostaneet, Maija on kadonnut. Oravaa on syytä varoa!

    ICT-ukkeli

    VastaaPoista

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